Confessions are actually not too bad...

okays...I recently realised something!

In these past couple of days, I found that after a confession to a girl you like is not something you cant get over, especially when she rejects you.

Now...the story goes, I like this close friend of mine...told her how I felt and wanted to know if she felt the same. She asked me how long i have felt this way and I told her that I have for quite sometime now.

She said that it really caught her by surprised and that she never felt that way towards me. She said its not a definite no but she wants to go with the flow and see what happens.

This really reminds me of an episode in HIMYM where they defined this theory where everyone gets caught in the vicious cycle of being hooked. I feel like I am being hooked by her....its like this e.g. "I can't be with you....right now." I think if you like someone u will always know...she definitely doesnt feel that way.

Now there's two options I can take:
1. Go back to being friends and act like everything is fine
2. Slowly become distant to her

At this stage I dont know what route I will take but just have to wait and see...I got too many things to worry about such as final 4wks of Uni and end of pharmacy degree. I cant believe its been 3 yrs since I have been up here....feels like a dream! This experience of being away from home has definitely turned out alot better than I expected....because I have grown and become more independent which I dont think I would have gotten if I got into pharmacy back home. Also the awesome friends I made...I am sure we will be lifelong friends! Thankyou Fate!

Anyways, back to my point...after telling her and she nicely rejected me, I thought I would be pretty heartbroken, but....No! I was fine. It was just better to get it off my chest and felt like whatever the outcome may have been...it was a win for me. Maybe I am just being an optimistic like I always am but yeh....life goes on and there are other girls out there.

I am slowly losing feelings for her as day goes by...i think some people will question how much I liked her....I did like her alot but being the person I am...I dont want to hold onto something thats not worth holding on. Sure I will always have some feelings for her but nothing is going to happen so I have to move on.

Not writing these past couple of days....have made me write quite alot for this post! Until next time.....

A - out :)